Do you ever find yourself thinking about some of the things and plans that you had hoped and dreamed about but thankfully didn’t pan out?
I do and I highly recommend that you do to.
Becoming my true self has not been the easiest journey. Everyday is a battle to overcome my need to conform to the ideas and thoughts of the people around me. My people pleaser want to be an A+ student, but in order to become my authentic self I have to overcome that desire. Sometime my self disciple wins out and sometime it’s just not enough. Even 10 years in to my journey, I still have times or days when I’m not living as my true self, though, they’ve become way less frequent. One of the tricks that I’ve used and is something that people have known about for hundred and thousands of years is that remembering past situations and past battles you’ve fought can go a long way to helping you fight your battle today.
In the Bible in Deuteronomy 6:20-21 God tells Israel to remember how they were slaves in Egypt and how God with a might hand saved them. Also, one of the reasons history classes are required in school is to ensure that we are familiar with the past triumphs and mistakes so that we can repeat the successes and not repeat the downfalls of our predecessors. So why should we remember our own personal moments of deliverance or being saved or of a bad situation turning around? Because they give us hope during situations that are tough today and help protect us from repeating our past mistakes.
For me on my journey to be my authentic self, remembrance has played a major part in helping me be authentic. I make a point to write down the stories from or keep random things from both hard periods in my life where I was not my authentic self and from moments when I was 100% my authentic self. Some of the things that I’ve written down or kept are:
- I wrote down and periodically go back and remember the hurt and anger I experienced when I felt that I had to do something that stressed me out and gave me anxiety just to be accepted or make people around me happy.
- I have pinned my ticket stub from a Disney trip last year with one of my best friends to my vision board over my desk. I was 100% myself that day; I love amusement parks, and it honestly was one of the best and most rejuvenating weekends.
- I wrote down and now go back to remember my feelings when I didn’t get a promotion in one of my past jobs that I had been told I was going to get; I also remember, though, that it was a God moment where He changed my life trajectory for the better. I remember and appreciate how that missed promotion pushed me to leave that job, which was one of the best things I’ve ever done. If I had stayed in my position I would have killed myself working to try and prove that I had value through money and job titles. Instead, I left and grew as a person and became more focused on being my authentic self.
I could 100% go on naming experiences and memories or telling the stories of random ticket stubs I’ve kept, but I think you get the point. The key for me is that I make sure to remember these moments often because they help me remember the pain I experienced when I wasn’t my true self and the joy of being 100% who I was created to be. When the desire to fit in feel like it’s to much, I remember.